Getting Baby To Sleep

Richard Ferber is director of the Center for Pediatric Sleep Disorders at Children’s Hospital in Boston who believes in a “progressive” approach to helping your child fall – and stay – asleep.
Ferber has developed a forward-thinking plan of action to instill consistent and regular sleep patterns in your child. Briefly, he suggests that after a warm, loving pre-bedtime routine such as singing, rocking, or reading a book, you put your child to bed while she’s still awake. According to Ferber, putting your child to bed while still awake is crucial to successfully teaching her to go to sleep on her own.

Once you put her in bed, leave the room. If she cries, don’t check on her until after a specified amount of time has passed. Once you do return to her room, soothe her with your voice but don’t pick her up, rock her, or feed her. Gradually increase the length of time that passes between checks. After about one week, your infant will learn that crying earns nothing more than a brief check from you, and isn’t worth the effort. She’ll learn to fall asleep on her own, without your help.

Ferber says that there are a number of things that may interfere with your child’s sleep. Before you “Ferberize,” you should make sure that feeding habits, pain, stress, or medications are not causing or contributing to your baby’s sleep problems.

Ferber recommends using his method if your baby is 6 months or older. Like most sleep experts, he says that by the time most normal, full-term infants are 3 months old, they no longer need a nighttime feeding. And at 6 months, none do.

Ferber’s method can be modified if you feel it’s too rigid. Stretch out Ferber’s seven-day program over 14 days so that you increase the wait between checks every other night rather than every night.

Besides being the optimal source of nutrition for your baby in her first year, nursing has obvious psychological benefits for both mother and baby. At birth, infants see only 12 to 15 inches, the distance between a nursing baby and its mother’s face. Studies have found that infants as young as 1 week prefer the smell of their own mother’s milk.

Many psychologists believe the nursing baby enjoys a sense of security from the warmth and presence of the mother, especially when there’s skin-to-skin contact during feeding. Parents of bottle-fed babies may be tempted to prop bottles in the baby’s mouth, with no human contact during feeding. But a nursing mother must cuddle her infant closely many times during the day. Nursing becomes more than a way to feed a baby; it’s a source of warmth and comfort.

When the baby is being fed and nurtured in this way, it’s natural for her to fall asleep quickly. When you know how much she can consume in one feeding, try to gently nudge her awake if she falls asleep too soon. You can easily rouse her with a little tickle of the feet. Otherwise, she’ll get hungry sooner and you’ll be feeding her more often.

Breast-feeding is good for new mothers as well as for their babies. There are no bottles to sterilize and no formula to buy, measure and mix. It may be easier for a nursing mother to lose the pounds of pregnancy as well, since nursing uses up extra calories. Lactation also stimulates the uterus to contract back to its original size.

A nursing mother is forced to get needed rest. She must sit down, put her feet up, and relax every few hours to nurse. Nursing at night is easy as well. No one has to stumble to the refrigerator for a bottle and warm it while the baby cries. If she’s lying down, a mother can doze while she nurses.

Parenting educator Elizabeth Pantley is president of Better Beginnings, Inc., a family resource and education company. Elizabeth frequently speaks to parents in schools, hospitals, and parent groups, and her presentations are received with enthusiasm and praise. Her newest book, The No Cry Sleep Solution: Gentle Ways to Help Your Baby Sleep through the Night offers a variety of sleep-inducing tips parents can use to develop an individual sleep program for their baby. Pantley’s methods are a gentler and more welcome option for those sleep-deprived parents who just can’t bear to let their child cry it out on their own, and find that approach too unfeeling or uncaring for their baby.

Probably the most important step to the overall success of developing a working solution is documenting the child’s sleeping and waking patterns each night on a “sleep chart.” This can be a difficult task for a sleep-deprived parent in the middle of the night, but is a crucial step and must be completed diligently. Pantley herself states her “solution” is certainly no overnight cure, or a one-size-fits-all method, but a gradual progression for educating your child to fall and stay asleep without constant intervention and assistance from the parent.

The successful program requires dedication and consistency from the parent. It could take a month or longer for your child to make the full transition to sleeping through the night, but one that will save a parent many sleepless nights in the long run. After the month is over, everyone who’s participated in the process will benefit from a more restful night, and the baby will learn how to sleep independently without the need for continual, repetitive comforting.